Thursday, February 17, 2011

alam mo ba iyong aneurysm?

alam mo ba iyong aneurysm? ang alam ko lang noon, madalas itong cause of death ng mga tao. basta pumutok na lang iyong ugat sa utak. walang symptoms. bigla na lang nangyayari. ayun, kapag pumutok iyong ugat mo, at di naagapan... patay ka. sabi sa akin, 10% lang daw ang survivor nito... i have yet to verify that. pero kung totoo man iyun, suwerte ko, kasi parte ako ng 10% survivors na un...

dahil last january 11, 2011 (1-11-11), at around 3am, i had aneurysm.

it was an ordinary day for me, wala akong kamalay-malay that in a few hours, manganganib ang buhay ko. i was at abs cbn, writing. noong nakasubmit na ako ng script, around 1am, umuwi na ako. hinatid ako sa condo noong EP ko ng green rose kasi he was on his way to the taping.

sa condo, nag tweet pa ako at nag status sa FB ng 1:11 am on 1-11-11. wish wish wish. tapos nagsulat konti sa journal. nagtoothbrush. nagbihis. nanood ng dvd at nagready na matulog.

and then i felt it -- the worst headache ever. parang biniyak ang ulo ko. it was the first time i felt that kind of headache... as in sobrang sakit. naiyak ako sa sakit. and the first thing i did, i unlocked my condo. praning kasi ako. kapag bumulagta man ako, at least bukas ang condo ko, makakapasok sila at makikita nila ako... kaka unlock ko lang ng condo nang masuka ako. as in suka ako ng suka... that was when i decided na i had to call help.

tinawagan ko ang rubi/idol/sabel headwriter ko na si joel mercado. he lives a floor below. past 3 na, siguradong tulog na siya but i had to call him. at habang dina-dial ko ang number niya, suka pa rin ako ng suka. good thing nagising siya sa tawag ko. "sir joel, puwede mo ba ako samahan sa hospital?" a few minutes after, we were on our way to st luke's.

i have vague recollection noong nasa st lukes na kami. ang alam ko lang, pinapirma lang ako to confirm na hindi ako buntis. tapos kung anu-anong tests na ginawa sa akin. and i don't remember anything after that...

i was in ICU. and i was told i was in and out of consciousness for three days. pero madalas, unconscious ako. i had respirator so i can breathe, i had several tubes in my body. and they had to tie my hands and feet kasi i was removing the respirator daw whenever i was awake.

nagkaroon lang ako ng ulirat talaga after four days. when i woke up, my nanay and my siblings from davao were there. my ate who is based in US was also there na. that was when i realized kung gaano ka grabe ang sakit ko...

bawal ang cellphone sa ICU pero i had my blackberry with me, so i was able to tweet and visit fb. that was when i felt i was loved... ang daming comments sa FB ko while i was asleep. puro "gising na, noringai" and "laban lang, noreen!" ang nakasulat...

noong gising na rin ako, kinuwento sakin sino mga pumunta. enchong dee was there the first night. my former roommate claring, my high school friend ilai, and my friend from abs danica never left my side daw. friends, relatives and co-workers visited me while i was unconscious. kinuwento sa akin na si direk joey, iyak ng iyak, at napagkamalan pang tatay ko. wala akong recollection ng lahat na iyun... ang natatandaan ko na lang na dumalaw sa akin (dahil gising na ako) ay sina jessy mendiola with jm de guzman, si carmen soo, at si alessandra de rossi.

so i was in ICU for two weeks. and then i had surgery para i-clip iyong aneurysm and i stayed at the hospital for another week. three weeks sa hospital. more than 2 million na gastos.

pero sobrang thankful ako sa abs at sa mga taga-abs dahil sa tulong nila. sobrang thankful ako sa mga kaibigan ko who stayed with me, who visited me while i was at the hospital, and sa mga friends ko na nag pass the hat para makatulong sa gastos. sobrang thankful ako sa nurses at doctors ng st lukes who kept me alive... sobrang thankful ako sa lahat ng tao na nagdasal para sa akin -- from fb to twitter to peyups and pex, kahit hindi ako kilala, pinagdasal nila ako... pero higit sa lahat, sobrang thankful ako sa Diyos, for giving me another chance to live... for this second life...

my doctor told me it was a miracle i got out of this alive. my surgeon said God has other plans for me... and i have to find out what's my purpose pa... kaya naman every day, i pray to thank God for this...

i was discharged from the hospital on feb 1. my surgeon said i should behave, and that i should take care of his masterpiece (meaning, the surgery he did to me). i told myself, this is my second life. hindi lahat ng tao nabibigyan ng chance na ma-extend ung buhay. i was blessed. kaya sa new life ko, i want to be a better person to make things right.

my sister asked me, kung hindi ako umabot ng hospital, kung hindi ako nabigyan ng 2nd chance at na-deds ako noong araw na iyun, san daw kaya ako pupunta... and although i know i have a personal relationship with God, at wala akong mortal sin na nagawa, hindi naman ganoon kalinis ang lifestyle ko. hindi ako ganoon kabait. may galit sa puso ko. hindi ako santa kaya hindi ako siguradong mapupunta ako sa langit...

kaya dito sa 2nd life ko, aayusin ko na ang buhay ko. pipilitin ko to be a better Christian. hindi lang sa pagsisimba every sunday, kundi sa pakikitungo ko sa mga tao, on how i live my life, and in my actions, thoughts and words.

the aneurysm was a wake up call to me. it made me realize how unpredictable life is. hindi mo alam, tatawa-tawa ka with friends now, after a few hours, wala ka na, deds na... kaya make the most of your life, and live your life like Christ did, para kapag when you come face to face with God, you'll be sure na you will enter heaven.

18 comments:

ijakes_exclusive said...

You are lucky Ms. Noreen. Kaya pala nasa Davao ka ngayon, I was wondering. My husband had the same case. One morning all of a sudden he was having a terrible headache, never in his life na nagkaroon siya ng headache. Pinipilit nya matulog but he can't so after mga 5 hours we took him to the emergency room. The doctor did ct scan and he told me a blood vessel in his brain burst. They had to care flight him to Scott & White Hospital. Sabi ng mga doctors pag di daw nag improve ang hubby ko they have to do surgery. After 48 hours naging ok naman, they did not do surgery and sabi nila his body will absorb the blood daw sa brain, a size of a golf ball. Sabi ng doctor kung natulog daw hubby ko, that's the end of him. Ok na siya ngayon but he had to rest for 2 months and lost his left peripheral vision for a month, ngayon 85% na lang yung left periperal vision nya, both of you are lucky to survived that. I hope you'll be back writing good stories for TV, you're one of the best.

noreen said...

salamat, ijakes_exclusive. yes your husband was lucky he survived aneurysm without undergoing any surgery... there's a reason why he survived aneurysm... hindi pa niya oras...

raissa said...

I am so glad to know that you are now okay. Still a long way to go to full recovery but getting there. My uncle died of aneurysm and also a family friend so it really hits home to me. Kaya nga yung scene ni Derek sa "And I Love You So" was and is still hard for me to see. Ang bilis lang nung sa uncle ko. a week before he died, humingi pa siya sa akin ng Tylenol coz he was already having a headache pero it was his hypertension daw. Then he was fine, then one morning, naka-receive na lang kami ng text that he was rushed to the hospital. Una heart attack daw but then later one aneurysm pala plus he had a cardiac arrest. He was only 39 and left my aunt & 5 children.

Yes, God sure still has more plans for you! Take a good rest in Davao with family & friends. I was actually there last week & nabasa ko tweet mo na pauwi ka nga. Thats the best thing for you, to recuperate around family. Take good care of yourself. Just want to add that my sister & I are loving Green Rose! Looking forward to more good stories from you!

noreen said...

hi raissa... di ko napaood simula nung and i love you so kaya di ako maka-relate :) try ko nga hanapin at panoorin :D

i had episodes of headaches din but i thought stress lang un o kaya migraine lang... yun, buti nga naagapan ako :)

thanks for watching GR, raissa. pakisabi din sa sis mo, thanks at marami pang pasabog ang show :)

tintin from malolos said...

so happy your ok na, kaya pala ang tagal walang enrty sa blog mo... now you can save my sanity once again... thank you, and welcome back...

Anonymous said...

Hi ms. Noreen!!! share ko Lang po sa inyo. My mom had a brain aneurysm back 2002. At first nung nasa pinas po kami laging may headache and fever po sya iinom sya na gamot tapos mawawala. Nagpunta na kami dito sa US nung 2001 after a year po sumasakit nanaman yung ulo ng mom ko tapos uminom sya sa Tylenol Kc ang akala Nya simpleng sakit ulo. Nung madaling araw po bilge na Lang Syang nagtumba at walang malay. Dinala na sya ng paramedic sa hospital at ang Sabi ng doctor 30% Lang ang chance Nya para mabuhay dahil meroon Syang brain aneurysm. Coma po sya for 2 days Sabi ng doctor dito balalaikas na gamot na ang ibinigay sa kanya. Nasa mom ko na Lang po Kung gigising sya tapos after two days po gumising. Talagang napakabait ni god. Akala po namin d na Nya kami makikilala pero nakilala Nya pO kami pero ang alam Nya dyan pa rin sya sa pinas nagwowork at mga kaco-worker Nya ang kilala Nya dyan sa pinas. D Nya alam ang mga nangyari sa kanya. After a week po nilipat sya ng ibang hospital at doon po ginawa ang coiling for a month nasa hospital and then another one month sa convalescent for all her theraphy. Napakabait talaga ng panginoon ninjutsu Nya ng secOnd life a mom ko. After her recovery at first hirap na hirap sya sinsabi Nya sa Amin na meroon pagkakataon na meroon Syang gustong isulat d Nya maisulat dati but now she's very ok!!! talagang pag malakas ang kapit sa panginoon d ka Nya pababayaan. Every year po meroon Syang angiogram.

Take care po always!!! GOd bless you!!!!

Abby

noreen said...

hi abby. buti na lang iyong sa Mom mo naagapan. may plano pa ang Diyos sa kanya... ako din, kailangan ko ng annual na angiogram. ganoon yata talaga para preventive measure at di na maulit :)

Jacq said...

I'm glad to hear that you're ok! I didn't know what you went through, and there I was, just checking your blog from time to time and wondering why you were not updating :(

Keep healthy Miss Noreen... you have lots of readers who are praying for your health :)

XYXY said...

I'm glad you're okay :)

Anonymous said...

im shock upon reading your post... nanindig mga balahibo ko... im an anonynous reader, infact avid fan of yours. even back in peyups.com. akala ko inabandona mo na ang pag-blog sa dami ng writing engagements mo. yun pala... nevertheless, I thank God you're back on track... take care of yourself always... you just dont know how many people you make happy with your writings. keep it up! and pray pray pray... :)

posh said...

Thank God you're safe, ate noreen. I was shocked when my friend and direk joey posted about your condition in facebook. Di pa daw tapos mission mo sa mundo ate. Hindi ka pa daw kse nag-aasawa hehe. Joke lang ate. Glad you're okay now. Ingat lagi. God bless!:)

Anonymous said...

"kaya dito sa 2nd life ko, aayusin ko na ang buhay ko. pipilitin ko to be a better Christian. hindi lang sa pagsisimba every sunday, kundi sa pakikitungo ko sa mga tao, on how i live my life, and in my actions, thoughts and words."

Sana nawala na ang sama ng loob mo sa akin, Noreen. Kahit hindi mo sabihin, naramdaman ko iyon. Wala naman na sa akin ang maliit na kaganapan. Mababaw nga lang kung tutuusin. Naging mabuti ka naman sa akin. Salamat sa Diyos at nakaligtas ka.

noreen said...

dear anonymous, sana sinabi mo kung sino ka. reading your post, i have an inkling kung sino ka pero am not sure... you mentioned "nararamdaman" mo ang tampo ko sayo. baka kasi hindi naman talaga ako nagtatampo... pero may tampo or wala, kung sino ka man na sinasabi mong may sama ako ng loob sa yo... wala na yun. lahat ng taong nanakit sa akin noon, kinalimutan ko na lahat ang nangyari...

gerry_girlie said...

Hello Miss Noreen, I was really inspire sa story mo. By the way I'm Arnita Alon Cruz my friends called me Girlie, you don't know me and I also don't know you pero kaka-research ko about aneurysm nabasa ko ang blog mo, at nagulat ako since I know Joel mercado, classmate ko siya during my HS life in Saint Anthony School of BiƱan. Anyway I also have that aneurysm but luckily na detect ito ng Doctor when I got this MIR test at St. Lukes Last March 30, 2011 due to my migraine I really thought that it was only my migraine kaya sumasakit ang ulo ko pero when the result come out April 4, 2011 and they saw aneurysm on my head so now I'm working out my surgery since accdg to the neurologist it is the only treatment para maiwasan ang pagputok nito. At fisrt ayoko kc nga ooperahan sa ulo parang ang di ko kaya pero after few weeks and now almost 3 months na at sa dami na ng nabasa kong testimony about tis aneurysm I'm ready to have an operation but it's not that easy since malaki din ang halaga na kakailangan at medyo nagi-ipon pa kami at nag aantay pa ako ng tawag ni Dr. Gerardo Legaspi for my sched. God really love us e got ways na malampasan natin ang mga pagsubok na ito with family, friends and relatives even long lost friends na ginagamit niya to help us. Thank you for your time reading this and sharing your experience with us. Take care and God bless you!

Anonymous said...

hi ms. noreen! i'm elaine and i've been reading your posts since peyups pa. i love how you write! i only got back to reading your blog today since i checked your twitter account. i was surprised to hear that you had an aneurysm! thank God that you are ok now. thankful too that God gave you your second life. you have more to offer the world! i wish you great health in the coming years. i look forward to reading more of your posts. take care of yourself and God bless, ms. noreen!

Anonymous said...

Hi Miss Noreen! Nag google lang ako about aneurysm ng makita ko ang blog mo. You're very lucky kc bihira talaga ang nkaka survive sa sakit na yan. Meron akong 3 kakilala na meron aneurysm una ang tita ko. Na confine sya sa hospital and waiting na lang sa operation pero luckily sinabi ng doctor na hindi na sya ooperahan. Takot na takot sya dati kase ulo na ang pinaguusapan na ooprahin kya baka daw hindi na sya magising. Second un friend ng sister ko bigla na din sumakit ang ulo hindi daw kinaya kaya dinala sa makati med if im not mistaken and dun nalaman na me pumutok nga na ugat at inoperahan. Maswerte sya at nkaligtas din at mabuti mapera un friend ng sister ko kase mahigit 1m daw nagastos. 3rd un family friend namin na hipag nung second person na knwento kong naoprehan sa aneurysm. Nalaman ng doctor na me aneursym sya kaya sumasakit lai ang ulo nya. Sa PGH sya nagpa opera at nangutang pa ng 500,000 para sa operasyon nya. Sya na nag desisyon na mapa opera siguro dahil na din sa takot at sakit na nararamdaman nya. Pero hindi sya sinwerte kase hindi na sya nagising at namatay sya after ng operasyon nya.
Kya ako nag search sa gogle about aneurysm kase 3 days na sumasakit ang ulo ko. Hindi ko alam kung stress ba ito o dahil lagi akong puyat. Natatakot ako kase bukod sa ayoko pang iwan ang 3 anak ko mahal ang gastos baka wala kame maibayad. Im praying na sana simpleng sakit ng ulo lang to. Siguro praning lang ako kase hindi naman grabe sumakit ulo ko tolerable naman sya. Natatakt ako pa check up kase baka sabihin nga ng doctor na me aneurysm ako.

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Anonymous said...

napakaswerte ng mga taong nabibigyan ng second chance mabuhay .17 years old ako nung nalaman namin na my aneurysm pala ako. days before ako dalhin sa hospital ilang beses sumakit ulo ko but hindi ko sya pinansin until yung gabi na matutulog na ko bigla my nafeel ako na hindi ko maintindihan basta narinig ko nlng sarili ko na umiiyak tas kung ano ano ginawa sakin sa bahay until nag decide sila na dalhin na ko sa hspital.nung una hindi pa nila alam ung sakit ko so gumawa sila ng series of tests at nung lumabas ung result ng ct scan dun nalaman na aneurysm daw at sabi ng doctor kelangan operahan ASAP naalala ko ung tiya ko na nahimatay nung narinig nya un.Parang gumuho mundo ko nung nasa hospital bukod sa kung ano ano gamot na tinutusok sakin mas nag pabigat ung wala akong magawa. hindi ko magalaw ung left side ng katawan ko at ung tanging tumatakbo sa isip ko nun Sana wag muna ako kunin ni Lord.Isang gabi nun nagising ako na parang pakiramdam ko nahati ung katawan ko at nung gabing un kwento ng nanay ko kung ano ano daw sinasabi ko kaya takot na takot ung nanay ko. Nilipat ako ng hspital at sabi dun hindi na kelangan mag undergo ng surgery pero nag stay pa rin ako ng ilang days sa ICU and after 2 weeks nakauwi na kme ng bahay .Ang hirap hirap nun kasi hindi ako makatulog tapos nakita ko ung nanay ko na nahihirapan din pero pinilit nyang maging matapang kaya sabi ko nun kelangan kong lumaban pra sakanya...Sa buhay natin may mga bagay na akala natin katapusan na ng mundo dahil sa bigat at hirap ng pinagdadaanan natin pero kung iisipin walang mahirap kung magtitiwala tayo sa Panginoon na sa bawat laban natin sa buhay palagi syang nakaalalay satin at kahit anong hirap hinding hindi nya tayo papabayaan .Ngayon habang sinusulat ko to naiiyak pa rin ako,hindi ako makapaniwala na malalagpasan ko un.Pero syempre natatakot pa rin ako sa posibleng mangyari .Sabi nga nila Milagro daw tlaga ung ngyri kaya habang buhay ako mag papasalamat sa Diyos at sa mga taong naging rason kung bakit patuloy akong lumalaban.☺