Monday, January 23, 2012

pointless...

after ten years of blogging, i am considering doing something i never thought i'd be doing -- stop blogging. parang pointless na. kasi kahit ako, nagsasawa na. iyun at iyun ang isyu ko. iyun at iyun ang sinusulat ko.

i have been blogging for ten years. parang wala na akong bagong maisusulat. wala na akong mai-se-share at maikukuwento. parang wala na kuwenta mga nangyayari sa buhay ko...

am thinking of turning this blog as private din kasi my nieces are all grown up. they have access to internet. they know my blog. one of them read all my entries for three days. i told them to stop reading my blog... they listened but... for how long? and how will i know na sinusunod nila talaga ako?

hanggang ngayon, i'd hear them talking about the blog entry i wrote five years ago. it happened five years ago but they only read it recently, kaya fresh pa sa isip nila. kaya minsan, they asked me about it and i was caught off-guard.

ayokong malaman nila kung gaano ako ka-pathetic noong in love ako. ayokong malaman nila kung ano nangyari sa buhay ko when i was their age. fourteen na ang isa sa kanila, edad ko when i first fell in love. ayokong mabasa nila ang lahat ng angsts at kasentihan ko for the last ten years.

oo, iniisip ko to stop blogging. at gawing private ang blog na ito... pero, handa na ba ako? hirap ako maglet go. alam iyan ng mga friends ko. kakayanin ko bang hindi mag blog? kakayanin ko bang itigil ang isang bagay na ilang taon ko na ginagawa?

chinese new year ngayon. new beginning. clean slate. fresh start...

kaya ko ba?

gash....

3 comments:

ihcahieh said...

Mahirap din mag let go sa isang bagay na nakasanayan mo na, although I do get your point. You write for TV now so you already have an outlet. In the end the decision is still yours to make. Besides, you could always go back to blogging when you feel like it. I'd say turn it private na nga lang. I think Blogspot has that option available.

Lyn Lyn said...

Ate Noreen,

Aloha! :) I've been a follower of your kwento since OD days and a proud fan (pag makita ko name mo sa tv screen), and it was since I was 14. 12 years ago na pla un. hahaha.. :) Hmm.. i think if that's ur worries, better na ung e-private mo lng is ung mga entry mo about those 'kasentihan', or u can tune ur blog into something na they can learn lessons from. :)

God bless and I hope everything is doing great sau. mwaaah! :)

Lit Coo said...

bilang tagasubaybay sa blog na 'to, nalungkot naman ako :( ms. noreen, pwede kayang magka-access pa rin ako pag ginawa mo na syang private blog?